Meet the femmes

Welcome to

Four Femmes on the Thames


Four Femmes on the Thames and their band, the Hommes, perform their own original comedy songs based on the everyday lives of women (and men) in the world as we know it today. Feminism, London, dating and sex play a big part in their shows. They love to combine comedy and story-telling through their four larger-than-life personalities.

“The Four Femmes on the Thames bring an hour of unadulterated bliss. This show is fabulous and very funny. I’m declaring myself a Four-Femmes fanatic.”

“These four talented starlets have managed to create something unique among their peers. I think you’ll agree that there’s no one else quite like them.”

“The glamorous ladies of Four Femmes capture the tear-inducing potential of a trip up The Shard quite beautifully”
Stephen Fry

“What makes the Four Femmes on the Thames stand out? They are funny, entertaining, great singers, with an excellent band”
Female Arts

“Such a splendid concoction… They write and sing eyebrow-raising songs on risque subjects and deserve to prove to a bigger audience that comedy and music really can combine”

“They simply stole the show from the moment they strutted confidently on”


The Four Femmes trained together for three years at the prestigious Royal Central School of Speech and Drama. They decided to put together a four part harmony group for a one off show in 2011, which later turned into regular shows with their band, The Hommes.​ The girls are professional actresses and enjoy juggling between performing in plays and creating shows for the Femmes.

Femme Filthy

Femme Filthy feels that she doesn’t have to affiliate herself with fickle, false folk. She doesn’t like anyone, unless they remind her of her favourite wine: full bodied, fresh and fundamentally alcoholic! She’s the type of Femme that can both flatter and offend within the same breath and doesn’t give a flip who she does it to. (Femme Filthy is played by Katy Baker)

Femme Free-Spirit

Femme Free-Spirit relies on no man and is proud to fund her own future. You will find this Femme fighting for her beliefs, marching at rallies and flirting with the flowers at festivals. You will not find her following her husband or frolicking with people’s hearts. She is the first Femme to put her fists up to protect her friends! (Femme Free-Spirit is played by Emma Drysdale)

Femme Fick

This flirty Femme lives in a fantasy land of fairytales and fiction. She is never false, she would never frape her friends and, as you can imagine, never farts (Oh, excuse me)! It may be far-fetched for some to French kiss the man of her dreams, but this dainty Femme frolics with the idea of happily ever after… (Femme Fick is played by Grace Rowe)

Femme Frivolous

Femme Frivolous is fixated with anything first-class! She strives for fame and fortune. She adores the finer things in life and is incredibly fond of diamonds. She’s fiery, frisky and can’t promise she’ll be faithful. She loves to flaunt her assets and has absolutely no objections to flattery! (Femme Frivolous is played by Abbey Mordue)


The Hommes are incredible musicians putting the jazz, swing and rhythm into the songs.
Gavin Whitworth on the keys, Adam Storey on the bass and Huw Williams on the drums.
They also have Homme names, but you’ll have to come to a live gig for them…